Things we’d never thought we’d say

Living in a van for years is a different way of life than the way most people live. And once you leave Europe, things become even more different. Sometimes things are downright weird. Leading us to say some things we’d never thought we’d say.

• Can you push the ostrich out of our van, it’s trying to eat our bug spray and we need that.
• I need chicken, I’ll go over there where the cow’s head is lying, the chicken stands are probably close by.
• There are hundreds of cayman in this lake. Ooh look, there’s a zipline across the lake, fun!
• I couldn’t find any bread. Yes I know it says bakery on the front but they only sold watermelons 
• Shouldn’t you be outside watching the mechanics before they break something else?
• Don’t get any diesel if they don’t have any water.
• What do you want me to do first; remove the bloody bones or put up Binkies line?
• Binkie! Stop chasing those lamas!
• Can you remember when we last showered? 
• Damn it, my hair is stuck in the cloth pegs, again!
• We need groceries. Oh no problem there’s a supermarket in 200 km’s(being from the tiny Netherlands, this is hilarious)
• This is a really good supermarket, they even sell fish sticks!
• I need the tent pegs so I can bake cookies.
• I’m tired, the penguins kept me awake most of the night.
• I am scared to put my shoes on.

And then there’s this funny story

We were in the mountains of North Macedonia. Some people told us” you should go there, it’s a great place to camp!” Other people said the same thing to us so we decided to drive up this mountain road from where we could drive further up onto a plateau where it was apparently great to camp. Half way up the mountain, the only road led us into a little village. According to the instructions we had to take a dirt road further up the mountain. Well the dirt road was there,but so was a wooden sign prohibiting all motorized vehicles. So we drove around the little village to see if we were supposed to take a different road. But it was the only way further up. Confused we decided to try and ask a local. We soon spotted a guy and luckily for us he spoke English. Before we could ask anything, he said “ you know what you guys should do? You should drive further up the mountain and camp there!” ???? We told him that was our plan since several people had recommended it already, but that there was a sign prohibiting motorized vehicles. Perhaps he knew another road up? “Oh no problem”he said, “don’t worry about the sign. You see, the guy who made the sign, is dead anyway!”

So we drove up there (half expecting an angry forest ranger to come after us) and camped there for several days. It was indeed a very nice area. And every day a few cars drove up there as well. Because in the Balkan everybody does what they want. And traffic signs are apparently no longer valid as soon as whoever put the sign up, dies.